SHE NEEDS YOUR ADVISE
Dear Readers,
The heart is not so smart! Despite all that our writer
suffered at the hands of the father of her son and against every counsel, she
cannot love another man.
Therefore, because of the circumstances on the ground, she needs your
advice. Please, read and advise her.
I
don’t know where to start from or how to tell my story, but I know I need help
and someone to tell me what to do. Dear Mary, I am at loss; my heart aches and
I am hurting. The sad thing, however, is the thought that I brought this on
myself. Please, kindly help me.
I
am the first daughter of my family. Although I have two older brothers,
according to my mother, a lot of responsibilities rest on my shoulders,
especially those of my younger ones; three of them.
I
finished my Ordinary National Diploma (OND), and during the course of my
industrial attachment, I met and fell in love with Dare, one of the IT
executives at the company where I served. I really did not know how it
happened, it wasn’t what I planned, but Dare swept me off my feet and I fell
for him. I am a member of the Celestial Church of Christ and an elderly woman,
who was a secretary at the company and who, because of our religious
affiliations, took me like her daughter, warned me.
I
really do not know why; my parents also
did not like him. My father, who normally takes to people, couldn’t stand him
and he always told me then that there was something about Dare that he could
not place. I wish Mama Abigail (that is what we all fondly called the elderly
woman in my office) had told me all she knew about Dare. But even if she did,
would I had listened at that time?
To
cut my long story short, despite all the warnings and advice, I allowed Dare to
have sex with me. In fact, he deflowered me and few months after that day, I
discovered that I was pregnant. Dare would have denied the paternity of my baby
if not for his mother. He lived with his mother and I had visited him at home
several times. Thank God his mother liked me and when the issue of my pregnancy
came up she stood her ground and refused to allow me to have an abortion.
Apart
from his issue, I had a tough time at home with my parents and older siblings.
Eventually, my father consented to my relationship with him but he stood his
ground on the fact that I must finish my Higher National Diploma before we
could get married.
I
was delivered of a baby boy; Dare’s carbon copy. I never knew even with the joy
of the new bay that Dare had other plans for himself. During my pregnancy, in
fact from the time his mother insisted that I kept the pregnancy, he became a
changed man from the man I used to know. He treated me with so much disrespect
and disdain that, sometimes, I was afraid to approach him for anything.
When
it was time to buy the baby stuffs, his mother and mine provided the money.
Even the day I gave birth, he was nowhere to be found. Fortunately, I was still
living with my parents and they provided enough psychological support for me. I
went back for my HND, and I went for Youth Service. By the time I returned, I
learnt Dare had married and was already raising his own family. I had no choice
but to continue with my life. The funny thing, however, is the fact that I was
unable to relate with or even date any other man. As much as Dare dislike me, I
loved him more.
My
son marked 10th birthday in June and you won’t believe that his father came
back that day, asking for forgiveness and my hand in a relationship.
My
parents refused to give their blessing. My father said what he was asking for was
rather cheap. Dare wants me to be his other woman as his wedded wife still
resides with him. People around me feel I deserve more that he is offering me.
Even some of my friends are of the opinion that I don’t need Dare.
Unanimously,
it has been agreed that he should be allowed to take responsibility for his
son.
My
problem, however, is that my heart remains with Dare. How can I convince people
around me that I love him so much that I don’t even mind being his other woman?
Please help me.
hmmmmmm.. confusing! if u want him then go for him.
ReplyDelete@Rosemary Omeje, assuming you were the one. what will you do?
ReplyDelete